30 jokes and sentences about paintings and painters
- Why did the painter go to jail? Because he committed an art crime!
- How do painters make money? By selling their masterpieces and working on the side as brush salesmen.
- Did you hear about the artist who painted with cheese? He made a real impression-stilton.
- What's the best way to become a famous painter? Spill paint all over yourself and run through an art gallery.
- What do you call a painter with a cold? Vincent Van Gogh!
- Why don't painters like to date other painters? They're too canvas-oriented.
- Why did the painter quit his job? He didn't get enough brush strokes.
- Why do painters always have to keep an eye on their brushes? They don't want them to brush off.
- What's a painter's favorite type of sandwich? One that's been freshly brushed with mayonnaise.
- What did the painting say to the wall? I've got you covered.
- What do you call a painting by a cat? A purrtrait.
- Why did the painter always paint outside? Because he didn't want to be framed.
- Why did the painter never do any work? He was waiting for his muse to paint the town red.
- How do you know if a painter is successful? When they have a palette full of green!
- Why do painters always carry their paintings on their backs? They're trying to make an impression.
- What do you call a group of painters that are always arguing? A brush fire.
- Why did the artist never use a paintbrush? He always finger painted.
- Why did the painter get into a fight with the sculpture? He thought he was too two-dimensional.
- What do you call a painter who's always in a bad mood? A canvas-back duck.
- Why did the artist refuse to paint any portraits of vegetables? He didn't want to be accused of still life painting.
- What did the art dealer say to the thief who stole a painting? You've made a real art heist.
- Why did the painter have to take an art class? He couldn't draw a blank.
- Why did the painter use his own blood in his paintings? He wanted to make them more hematological.
- What do you call a painting that can move and talk? Art-ificial intelligence.
- Why did the painter paint himself as a tiny figure in the corner of the painting? He wanted to make himself smaller than life.
- Why did the artist paint himself in a suit of armor? He wanted to protect his artistic vision.
- What did the painter say when he finished painting the Mona Lisa? "Eh, it's just a Lisa."
- Why did the painter always carry a ladder with him? He was looking for a higher perspective.
- What do you call a painting that has a lot of birds in it? A feathered masterpiece.
- Why did the painter refuse to paint any flowers? He didn't want to be a pansy artist.
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